Are You a Hero Engineering Manager? (And Why It’s a Problem)

“Don’t worry, Anton will finish that long meeting in a minute, he’ll help us solve this.”

I was just walking toward the team’s area when I heard it. Music to my ears.

Who doesn’t like to feel needed?

And when I actually solved that weird bug? Pure dopamine. I’m a genius. I’m awesome.

It took me a few (embarrassing) years to understand I have not one, but 3(!) ‘hero EM’ syndromes 🤦‍♂️

• The Fixer EM
• The Hen
• The Shit Umbrella

In today’s article, I’ll cover:

• A story from my career
• What each syndrome looks like
• What can you do about it

The Fixer EM

Before I was promoted, I was the strongest developer on the team.

It took me only a few months to let go of ‘critical coding tasks’, as I understood I can’t be a bottleneck.

It took me YEARS to let go of the need to be a ‘last resort’. I truly enjoy solving difficult problems, and as I was familiar with almost every part of our systems, I was able to provide insights others didn’t think about, and solve the toughest problems.

Being the fixer EM can become an addiction.

Saving the day gives a dopamine hit. Being the “go-to” person becomes an identity. Some (like me) are not burning out, but get high on the adrenaline.

How to know if you have the syndrome

You are a very strong ICs who has become a manager. You like to be called for difficult problems. You enjoy being the last resort, and hate being technically irrelevant.

What’s the problem

You rob your team of some of the best growth opportunities. It’s a completely different thing to see how YOU solved something, and to solve something themselves.

This quote summarizes it well:

A good manager makes you think: “Wow, he’s a genius.”
A great manager makes you think: “Wow, I’m a genius.”

What can you do about it

This one is tricky.

“Stopping” yourself feels very weird. If a problem is urgent, how can you say, “Solve it without me, I want you to learn”.

So start with non-urgent problems, and build that confidence slowly. Share your knowledge - instead of just solving a problem, share how exactly you solved it.

Small example: In my team, we managed 10+ microservices and multiple external systems. Logs were all over the place. I used a basic Google Sheet to build a timeline and drop in relevant logs. Old school, but it helped debug some crazy race conditions.

Once you teach your system and knowledge, you’ll gain confidence, people will know the playbook to follow, and you’ll be able to let go.

The next step is to “delay” yourself by 15-20 minutes. Let someone ELSE take the lead. Then, once you join, you can be a sidekick, and not the main character. Nudge them if you need, but don’t take control.

The Shit Umbrella EM

9 years ago, in my first management role, I was told that my job is to be the ‘shit umbrella’ of my team:

The ‘outside world’ - customers, other teams, the management - would throw ‘shit’ at the team, and I had to protect them so they’ll be able to work in “peace and happiness”.

I've stuck with this approach for a long time.

I tried to make my people believe that each bad decision was the last one and that we are right on the verge of a change. When I felt the Product team was doing shitty work, I fought it myself, and presented a smiling face to the team.

I didn’t share bad news and generally isolated them from the rest of the company.

How to know if you have the syndrome

You protect your team from organizational chaos. Unclear strategies, shifting priorities, overloaded roadmaps - you take the hit, so your engineers can focus. You want to create a “safe bubble” for your team.

What’s the problem

You mean well, but you're creating a false sense of stability. You act as a buffer to avoid discomfort. You hide chaos to keep morale up. But reality always breaks through, and when it does, your team isn’t ready.

In the end, this protection backfires. It leads to shock, confusion, and frustration, not trust.

As Ronald Heifetz and Marty Linsky wrote:

Leadership is disappointing people at a rate they can absorb

What can you do about it

James Stanier wrote a great article about it, titled “The disappointment frontier”. Here are some great tips he shared:

Start with radical context-sharing. Tell your team what’s going on - even if it’s uncertain or messy. Talk about the company, other teams, customers, shifting priorities. Let them see the full picture.

Be honest about control. What decisions are yours? Own them - even if it makes you the “bad guy.” It’s better than hiding behind “leadership decided…” That just builds resentment.

For things you can’t control, **be a collaborator. ** Example: You don’t control promotions, but you can help prepare a great packet, coach them, and vouch for them in the room. If the answer is no, you’re still on their side. You can continue this collaboration to help them understand why and what they can do to increase their chances next time around.

Ask yourself:

• What are you shielding your team from right now?
• Are you overpromising anything?
• Where can you be more transparent?
• Are you pretending not to be the decision maker to avoid conflict?

Remember: your job isn’t to build a utopia. It’s to help your team succeed in reality.

The Hen EM

One day I noticed one of my team members had fewer vacation days than the others. Weird.

I asked HR to check - turns out she’d signed an old version of the contract by mistake. They sent her a new one, starting from that day forward.

I said: that’s not fair. She should get those missing days retroactively - it was just 5-6 days over two years. HR refused.

So I escalated. I pushed my own manager to fight for it.

And he just looked at me and said:

“Is this really your fight? She didn’t even ask. You did. You were told no. Is this the hill you want to die on?”

He had a point.

He asked:

“Do you think every manager she’ll ever have will fight for her every whim? Maybe she needs to learn to push for herself. You’re overprotecting her.”

That hit hard. But he was right.

How to know if you have the syndrome

You take care of your people… a bit too much. You fight for their raises, their PTO, their tools - even small stuff they didn’t ask for. You act like their champion in every battle. Sounds noble. But you rarely let them fight their own fights.

What’s the problem

In “The Victim Trap in Engineering Management”, I wrote about the Drama Triangle - where the hero ends up reinforcing the role of the victim.

This is exactly that.

When you’re always the hero, your people never learn to negotiate, to advocate, to speak up. You’re protecting them from reality - and that’s not leadership. That’s infantilizing.

Yes, you should fight for your team - but not instead of them.

What can you do about it

Next time someone wants a raise?
Coach them. Help them prepare the data. Then let them present it to the VP - while you sit in the room, backing them up.

Someone has an issue with a peer or another manager?
Don’t jump in. Ask: “Do you want me to help you phrase something?” Not: “I’ll go talk to them.”

You’re still supporting - just not rescuing.
Let them fight. That’s how they grow.

Wrap up

These three hero EM patterns - the fixer, the shit umbrella, and the hen - are tempting. They feel good. You feel useful. You actually care about your people, and have good intentions.

But they slow your team down. They block people from growing. And they make you a bottleneck.

If you noticed yourself in one of these patterns, great. That’s the first step.

Try to catch it in real time, and pause. Let your team lead.

FAQ

What is the hero engineering manager syndrome?
It's when engineering managers consistently step in to save the day - fixing bugs, shielding the team, or fighting every battle. It feels helpful but hurts long-term team growth.

Why is being the “fixer” a problem in engineering management?
Because it makes the team dependent. They don’t learn to solve problems on their own. You become a bottleneck.

How do I stop shielding my team from company chaos?
Start sharing more context. Be honest about what you control and what you don’t. Let your team learn to deal with the messy parts of the org.

Should managers fight all of their team’s battles?
No. Help your team prepare, but let them lead. It builds independence, confidence, and resilience.

What’s the downside of being too protective as a manager?
You risk infantilizing your team. If they never advocate for themselves, they’ll struggle without you.